When it comes to dating, most of us are a little skittish. After all, we’re talking to someone we hardly know and hoping they like who we really are.

Well, most of us, anyway.

For the rest of the daters out there, you might not be skittish because you’re projecting a completely different personality than the one you wear during your dating off-hours. Yes, you are faking it during your dates, but it seems to work, so what’s the harm in it?

Let’s sit down for a moment and think about why being yourself is the best way to date:

• It’s easier
• It takes less energy
• You don’t have to constantly second guess your every word, action, and expression

When you are just ‘you,’ you get to show your date what they’re in for - like it or not. And would you really want to waste your time with someone who isn’t truly the person they seem to be? No, you’d call them a liar and something that was just trying to get something from you.

So, why are you doing it too?

Becoming more comfortable with yourself is not an overnight process, to be sure. But it is something which will help you hook up and match up with a person who likes you for who you are - on the date and down the road.

You finally got motivated to lose those last 5 pounds - you didn’t think it was possible before, but now you’re well on your way to shedding the extra weight. You’re feeling terrific…until you get asked out to dinner by the hot guy in your office.

What do you do? You know he wants to go to that hot new restaurant in town, the one with the 3000 calorie dishes.

Should you say no?

No.

Dieting doesn’t have to take you out of the dating game until you’re hit your goal weight - in fact, why not use it as more inspiration to keep your new figure?

Here are some tips to dating while dieting:

• Order smaller dishes - Choose appetizers instead of entrees to help keep your portions small.
• Eat light during the day - This way, you can afford to eat a little more during your date.
• Call ahead to see what the restaurant offers - You can check to see what dishes will still work within your diet plan.
• Start with soup and salad - These are generally lower in calories and they fill you up before a fattening main course, helping to slow down diet damage.

But in the end, one meal is not going to stop your weight loss. In fact, letting loose once in a while might just keep you on track.

When it’s time to head out for a spooky date on Halloween, you need to match up with your date - especially if you’re going to be going to a party with a contest to win.

Thankfully, there are plenty of websites dedicated to ideas for couples, but why not turn costume shopping into a date too?

Head to your local costume shop in the afternoon and start trying on costumes that appeal to the both of you. That way, you can try on even the silly ones to have a fun time without having to spend a cent until you find the costume that works for you.

You can even ask the clerks to point you to the couples section (every shop should have an area like this). Here, you will find your perfect costume matchup.

But if you don’t want to spend a lot of money, there’s always the local thrift store.

Here are some ideas you can take with you:

• 80’s prom couple - think aqua dressed and thin ties
• Zombies
• Nerds

Think about what might be funny and what might be easy to find. And as you walk around, you’ll probably have even more ideas.

Halloween is a fun time, so why not share it with a fun date?

It’s a sad day when high schools begin to teach about dating violence in the classroom. But the reality is that many teens, especially girls, are going to have troubles with dating violence at one point in their lives.

To help combat this grim reality, those who are new to the dating scene need to keep these rules in mind for themselves as they head out with a new date:

• Always tell someone where you’re going - This way, people can find you if you’ve been gone for too long or they just want to check in on you. If your date changes your dating location at the last minute, refuse to go there until you let someone else know. Or, you can be subtle and just text message the change to a friend.
• Always have a time frame in mind and let others know - Let your friends and family know when you will be back, and then stick to the plan.
• Any sign of violence is a bad sign - Even if your date is just ‘playing rough,’ if it makes you uncomfortable, you need to leave your date, call home and get someone to pick you up.
• If you’ve already experienced violence, you need to tell someone - Even if you don’t think it’s a big deal, letting someone know will help you gain perspective on the situation. And they can help you get the help you need, even if you don’t want to.
• Never go anywhere that’s not public until you feel completely comfortable with someone - This is common sense. Get to know a person first before you head back to their house or to a dark alley.

Dating violence typically happens with someone you know well…or someone you thought you knew. No matter how long you’ve been going out or how much you love this person, any violence is too much violence. You need to get away from this person now, before it’s too late.

Just when you thought online dating was dead, another success story emerges. A once shy woman turns into a dating diva - and finds love along the way.

It’s the new American/Worldwide dream, isn’t it?

By being able to surf around dating websites and truly learn what parts of yourself are positive and worth mentioning, you can begin to see just what a valuable person you are to your prospective dates.

Instead of having to hang out at a bar with other women/men who are more attractive than you (or, at least, it seems to be that way), you can go online and be anyone you want. Or you can be exactly who you are, but with more confidence than you might have in person.

From learning to chat with others online to posting a profile that sings your praises, you can turn a dating slump into a time when your calendar is full.

If you’ve been feel depressed about your dating mojo, it’s time to start heading online to rediscover the fox you really are.

Online dating helps you:

• Be confident
• Announce your dating preferences
• Meet people from all over the world

The odds are stacked in your favor, no matter what dating website you might choose or what networking site you might list yourself on.

Stop feeling like a dating disaster, and find your inner diva once more!

It seems as though everyone has an online profile somewhere on the web. And for most of us, we’re actually on multiple networking sites - some for work, some for fun, and some with a mix of both of our needs.

Let’s look at two of the most popular - Facebook and MySpace.

Both of these sites have ways that you can proclaim your single-ness to the rest of the world, allowing you to have a free way to meet dates online. But is it really as effective as it might seem? Or are traditional dating sites the way to go?

Here are the pros of networking sites:

• They offer you a look into the personality of your date
• They can give you a sense of who they hang out with
• You can look at their profile before talking to them
• They’re free to use!

But here are the cons of using networking sites as dating sites:

• They can lead to long term issues with people bugging you for dates
• They can lure less then truthful people to your profile
• The security risk is higher

Just as with any website for dating, there are positives and negatives, so you need to weigh the risks before heading into the dating pool of these sites. But the good news? You don’t have to accept anyone as a friend until you’re completely sure you want them to be a friend.

Choose your friends wisely, and you might find your dating life spicing up.

Long distance relationships used to be rather rare. After all, you used to simply date those who were in your zip code because it was easier, it was more convenient, and that’s who you knew.

But in today’s world of electronic communication and better transportation, things are changing. We meet people who aren’t in our city and we begin relationships with those in other parts of the country.

The only question is – can these relationships work? Yes, yes they can. Here’s how:

• Be clear about what you want – If you just want someone to date, that’s fine, but if you’re looking for a long term partner, you need to say so up front. Having conflicting ideas about where the relationship is headed is an easy way to create a long distance disaster.
• Communicate often – This is a time when communication is easier than ever. So, make sure to talk often and to talk about things other than what you did today.
• Visit each other – You can’t build and sustain a relationship on emails alone. You need to both be willing to visit each other until you make a decision to break up or move into one location together.
• Be thoughtful – Since you’re not in each other’s lives on a daily basis, you will want to make sure you are being extra thoughtful about special occasions.
• Be honest – When you feel as though things aren’t working out, let the other person know, try to work things out, and if it’s still not working, be honest about it.

Long distance relationships don’t last forever, as someone always moves in the end when they work out. So, to make sure yours goes the distance, follow this advice.

When you’ve been around the block a few times, you might become a little gun-shy in terms of dating. And it’s no wonder really. If you’ve been away from the dating scene for a while, things have changed. A lot.

But that doesn’t mean you should just give up dating. Nope, there are plenty of perks to heading out and trying to see what the dating pool now holds – even if the waters are a bit murkier than you remember them.

It all begins with self confidence. The good news is that if you’re a bit older than the skinny blondes around you, you’re going to have a much better chance of snagging a guy than they are. After all, you’re interesting, you’re fun, and you know what you want.

Don’t believe this? Try out your charm on someone the next time you’re out.

Even if you don’t end up getting a date with them, it’s nearly guaranteed you will find a date that night. Honestly.

When you have self confidence, you will attract attention and attention turns into dates. Being yourself, while it seems to go against the ‘rules’ of dating, is actually something that works in your favor.

Sure, not everyone is going to like you, but you don’t want just anyone to like you, do you?

So if you’re unsure as to whether you should date or not, maybe it’s time to simply jump out there, show ‘em what you got and see what you can reel in.

If you date, you will breakup with someone at some point. It’s not a pretty thing, but it’s reality. After all, if you don’t break up with someone, you’re simply staying in a relationship you don’t enjoy.

Or you’re marrying them. Here are some ways to make a breakup easier:

• Be quick – There’s no need to give a long and drawn out explanation for the reasons why you need to say goodbye. Just say it’s over, give a short explanation and walk away.
• Be honest – There’s no need to be mean, but you should always be honest when you break up with someone. Lying isn’t going to help them or you get over this transition any quicker.
• Be in public – Make sure you break up with someone when you’re out and about, not over the phone or over email. Those are cowardly and they can often be messages that are spread to others. Do it in person.
• Be kind – This is a person you though you could really care about, so think about how it would feel if the tables were turned. How would you want to be treated?

The reality of dating is that 99% of all your relationships are going to fail or they’re just not going to work out. So, breaking up is just a part of this cycle. And each breakup means you’re getting closer to the one that steals your heart.

Now that we’re entering the sweltering days of summer, it’s time to rethink your current dating plans.

After all, it’s a little too hot for the beach and even hotter for that long romantic walk you had planned. So, it’s time to go to Plan B, C, D, E….

There are plenty of ways to stay cool and have a great time on a date.

• Go to the movies – Try heading to your local movie theatre for some back to back flicks. Each of you can choose one movie to see and hang out in their air conditioned rec area between the show times.
• Head to the bookstore – Since bookstores often have much more than just books these days, why not take a date there. Split up to look at things you might want to buy and then find one of those comfy couches to read until the sun goes down.
• Try the museum – If you’re looking for a little culture, head to the museum. It’s generally free for the regular exhibits and it’s always cool. They also tend to have great eating spaces where you can discuss your favorite artists.
• Go for a drive – If you one of you owns a convertible or isn’t opposed to renting one for a day, take a drive around the town or to any nearby tourist areas. Sure, gas is pricey these days, but one day on the road might be just the right way to start a relationship. And that’s worth it.Dating in the heat doesn’t have to make you sweat!